“Why would you need an Up button, if you were already on the top floor?”
— Violet Baudelaire, examining one of the buttons near the second pair of elevator doors outside the Squalor penthouse
Dear Reader,
It is with great despondency that I must inform you that the collection you have stumbled upon is almost completely dedicated to the Baudelaire orphans, the Quagmires, several unpleasant people, several pleasant people in unpleasant situations and an organization that may or may not be watching you at this very moment.
Most unsettling things can be learned by browsing through this collection of bits and pieces of evidence and sorrow. Read at your own risk.
With all due respect,
An unknown researcher of
The Volunteer Fire Department
• Ask me anything
— Violet Baudelaire, examining one of the buttons near the second pair of elevator doors outside the Squalor penthouse